Happy Stinking Birthday to Me.... PSA with TMI and a whole lotta WHINE!

Ugh! No. 42 has gone down in history as the worst, stinking birthday in my entire life! Seriously, I cannot even remember the last time I had such a bad day--let alone BIRTHDAY! Thursday started innocently enough. Gary made me breakfast, the girls plastered me with Happy Birthday kisses, the boys grunted a well wish in passing.... I had one work appointment and then Gary and I were going to head to Ft. Wayne for my doctor appointment and go out for a birthday lunch. Alone. With no kids. There was a margarita in my future! Woo hoo! But, the girls developed enough complaints that they had to go to the doctor for ear pain and the other for a cough that will not go away. So, Gary and I split up--he took the girls to the doctor (because of course the only time they could get in was at the same time as my dr. appt.). My whine is about my dr.appt. The TMI is about my dr. appt. And the PSA is for any other woman experiencing what I have been! TMI- I've been dealing with an incredibly aggravating situation for months and months. I assumed it was a regular old yeast infection that wouldn't go away because I'm also diabetic. Way back in May I saw my gyno for the routine girl exam (that I had put off for roughly seven years.... yeah, I know). I 'fessed up about the "yeast infection" and begged for help. SINCE THEN, we have been doing pills, creams, and chanting around a fire in the dead of night--but nothing has helped! So, I went back again early November. It's rather disconcerting to have someone seated in front of you peering at your special parts saying " OMG! This is terrible! I've never seen anything so bad!" Yeah. That's why I'm here. Another prescription and an appt. for a recheck. Yep--recheck on my birthday. She looks again. Says it's better but not gone. She thinks she knows what it is but needs to do a skin biopsy to be sure. I try to tell her that I don't think it's a very good birthday present... she can't hear me because she's directing the nurse to get all the supplies for the biopsy. At this point--I'm thinking Gary really should be here. She explains the procedure and it sounds okay. She leaves and the nurse tells me what it's REALLY going to be like!! I hear the margaritas calling me from an empty booth at Applebee's. Do I still have time to RUN? Doc is back and proceeds to give me a shot that hurts worse than any bee sting, wasp sting, hornet sting, knife wound--you name it! .... while I'm lying there with tears rolling down my face from that--she chats with me to wait for the numbing effects. Then, while we're chatting (does every dentist and doctor use this technique?) she, without warning, RIPS some skin from my NOT NUMBED ^(#$(*&!!@&***. I am absolutely devastated and the tears and hiccuping sobs come quickly and fiercely! That is THE worst pain I have ever felt (and I've had 4 kids--1 all natural)! She apologizes and tries to give my instructions for the healing period (TWO WEEKS!)...but can also tell that I'm NOT comprehending.... They won't let me go home until they can stop the bleeding and think I'm calm enough to drive. I was so glad I felt kind of blah and wore sweats. Ugh! I cried all the way home...and I'm really not too much of a crier. It was a mixture of pain and a pity party. The misery continued --got into a fight with Gary because he could not comprehend what had happened and wasn't caring/concerned enough for my tastes. More misery when I remember that I only get a nap and then we must all head to Daisy's Spell Bowl. Uncomfortable, hot, hard bleacher seats for 2 HOURS!! I had no desire to go out to dinner for my birthday--but the kids expected it and it was too late to cook at home by then. And then, I made the mistake of getting a mirror to see what she had done! It's a HOLE the size of a dime and much of the area surrounding is incredibly swollen. I have to keep coating with Neopsorin. Okay....that was all the TMI and whine. For the PSA--ladies! Don't suffer, don't do over the counter--call your doctor! The thing she suspects is Lichen Sclerosus but she also has to rule out cancer and a bunch of other skin disorders. So, happy stinking birthday to me. It's Sunday now, and I'm still not pain free and I still have to wait for results of the skin biopsy.