The NoFun Part of Growing Older

Ahhhhh....growing older. My husband Gary is 10 years older than I am and the only one who keeps getting older. Today he had a wonderful adventure required for men over 50: the colonoscopy! And, true to everyone's warnings--the prep was way worse than the procedure. I really would have preferred to miss the day of prep over sitting in the hospital and trying to read my books from 8:00 this morning until about 11:30 a.m. At that point, they called me back to stand by his side in the cold, tiny recovery cubicle while he released all of the air that they pumped into him. I'm not sure why I was brought back there for that part of the procedure--but my husband was estatic to have permission and valid reason to let 'em rip. He was quite pleased with himself. In between gastric elephant trumpets, he outlined exactly what he wanted for lunch, snack, dinner and another snack. This poor man hadn't been allowed to eat anything since Sunday night. His only misery from that procedure was the hunger. Then I was dismissed after witnessing that he was still alive and meeting the doctor responsible for his glorious farting marathon. They did find a couple of polyps and removed them. We have to wait a week for results to find out what kind of polyps they are (normal or cancerous). He also has diverticulosis--I was totally NOT surprised by that one. He's lucky he's never had a serious flare up (diverticulitis) yet. But, we did learn that lots of fruit and some Metamucil is in his near future (lilke tomorrow). There was also the sweet moment when the nurse totally asked with a question in her voice "Are you his... (pause) wife?" It would not have been the first time I've been mistaken for a daughter--and since he got to revel in his natural man-ability of flatulence, I got to relish in the proof that I am just not getting any older.